I know that chronic illnesses have ups and downs. I know that there will be times when my symptoms are unbearable and times when they are barely noticeable.
But this weekend it feels like it’s getting worse. I feel like my body has no resilience. I am living weekend to weekend. Yesterday I went for lunch with a friend and we went to the theatre. It was nice. It didn’t involve much walking or physical activity at all, yet I was still knackered when I got home. Yesterday evening my pain got worse than it ever has before. As in the generalised all over achyness as opposed to a specific pain actually caused by something (anyone ever stepped on a plug? Ouch!)
Today I took my scouts on a hike. It was 6 miles. I am tireddd! When I agreed to do this, it was at a time when my pain wasn’t too bad. Last night I was not sure if i would be able to do it today. Managed to sleep and felt a lot better this morning. Not good, but better than yesterday.
So I did the hike. I am bloody knackered. I don’t think I’ll do it again next year if things are the same. I’m disappointed. The fear I had last night was this is the beginning of not being able to do things. This is the beginning of limiting my activities, of not being able to do activities that “normal” people can do. That’s scary. It makes me sad.
So now that I’ve overdone it, it’s time for self care…
I have just been through half of my wardrobe and thrown a load of stuff out, I feel exhilarated. For some reason, despite feeling exhausted, it felt like what I wanted to do. So I did. I am watching some random stuff on YouTube while I did it, just chilling.
I have put a face mask on and it has dried and now my face looks all funny and shiny. I will peal it off soon 😊 I am about to run a nice bubble bath listening to relaxing music and then I’ll put my pyjamas on. Lovely!
Hope everyone is having a nice and restful weekend and not overdoing it!