Day 28 —You read about yourself in your brother/sister, girlfriend/boyfriend’s diary. What did you read?
I think this will be a short one, I’m not sure what to write for this one.
For my brother – I would imagine it wouldn’t be very complimentary. Although we don’t “not get on”, we have our fair share of sibling arguments, and we wind each other up all the time.
For my boyfriend – I think he would write about being worried about me, if anything. I know it hurts him a lot to see me like this, and when I feel really low I know how much it hurts him when I talk to him about it, and I know he wants to help but he doesn’t know how. I am so lucky to have him, he cares so much and puts up with so much just to be with me.
I’m going to take this writing prompt a bit further, as the whole point of them is to get you to write!! I’m going to write about my brother and my boyfriend a bit more.
My brother, I will call him Mouse (because that’s a nickname I call him, based on his real name.*) He is 13 years old and is growing up fast. Although he is 6 years younger than me, he is now several inches taller than me!! That was not a nice discovery – I came home from uni one time, and suddenly he was taller than me!
He is good natured really – although he seems to be in a mood most of the time, I guess that’s what 13 year old boys are like. We get on sometimes, and last night (NYE) we managed to get on alright, and we played a game with my cousin (Actress) which is like pictionary but with play dough!
I feel sorry for my brother really. He has had to see my mum go through depression, and as he was much younger than me I’d imagine he didn’t really understand it. Why she is sometimes so short tempered and spent so many days in bed, and not being able to do things like the cooking etc. And now there’s me, and I still don’t think he knows what’s going on. He’s 13 and got nothing to worry about, except that he is getting like me in terms of perfectionism – he worries about not doing well enough at school, even though he’s very bright. I hope he doesn’t turn out like me.
And my boyfriend. He’s the loveliest person I know. Although he winds me up a lot (it’s not hard these days) he really cares about me and is always there for me when I need him. (And he knows when I’m not ok, even though I say I am.) He is my best friend more than my boyfriend, and I’m glad it’s that way round. Because of things with the ex, I’m very cautious with my feelings – I don’t want to be out of control. I’m worried about getting hurt again, and there are loads of things that trigger panic and fear in me. Even though for more than half of the year I live the other end of the country, we still talk or at least text everyday. I feel like I’d be lost without him, but I like to think that our friendship is strong enough that even if we split up, we would still be friends.
I do worry that eventually he is going to get fed up of how I am. I know I am difficult to be with, but he says he doesn’t care, and that he wants to be with me anyway. I’m always going to have insecurities about this, seeing as how things ended with the ex, but I feel so bad that he has to deal with the problems which were created by the ex, and the ex just got to walk away and doesn’t have to deal with the consequences of his actions.
Anyway, I think that’s enough of a random ramble. I guess this shows that writing prompts can be helpful, as I didn’t have any ideas for a post tonight, but now I’ve written quite a lot – on a different topic.
*Can anyone guess? – It’s not a direct link!