I’m sick of being the weak one.
I always was. I still am.
I was that kid that always cried in school. The one that was over-sensitive. I learned that I was worth nothing and that was reinforced over and over. I’ll never be good enough for any of you will I?
And they wonder why I have no self-esteem, they wonder why I doubt myself so much.
I wonder whether I was depressed as a child. I can remember going to help out in reception at lunchtime sometimes, because I wanted to get away from the ones who always teased me. But it’s just teasing right?
And people always choose other people over me. I’m sick of being second best. Not even second best, the last alternative.
Feeling pretty low today.
Because sitting here and moaning is really going to help me pass my German exam…
Failure. Disappointment. Lonely. Lost. Scared. Pathetic. Hurt. Anxious. Sad. Broken. Weak. Useless. Fake. Nothing. That’s me.
(Sorry about the fragmented post. It doesn’t make sense)