Where has my motivation gone?

I am generally a driven person. I have high expectations of myself and I want to succeed. I have goals in my life, goals which will be hard to achieve but I have always been determined to keep going until I reach them.

And yet now none of it seems to matter.

I have ridiculous amounts of coursework to do. I have exams coming up. And I’m doing nothing. I have no motivation to do my work. My concentration is through the floor, and my mood is down there with it. I sit and look at the list of things to do and it’s like a huge mountain. I know I should break it down into little mole hills, and then it will seem possible. But even that feels like too much effort.

I feel like I’m being lazy. Other people will think I am making a fuss over nothing. The closer the deadlines come, the less realistic the chance of me getting the work done. And yet I’m not panicking. Not yet. I don’t really care. None of it really matters.

But when I don’t get a first, then it will matter. Then I will feel like a failure. What am I saying? I already feel like a failure.

I should be able to do this. It’s not that I don’t have the intelligence, it can’t be that hard. Everyone else manages. And yet my head is all fuzzy and cloudy, with nothing making sense. My memory is terrible, I can’t concentrate at all, and most worryingly, I don’t even care about my work right now, even though it’s the things I wanted to study, and the subject that I am was passionate about.

I want the determination back, the motivation, the drive. Where has it all gone?

I’m running out of time.

Anyone know how to concentrate?

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8 thoughts on “Where has my motivation gone?

  1. dmauldin53 says:

    I can’t help you with the concentration because I have problems there myself. I can empathize with you as I have been at the bottom of the mountain too with no motivation to start climbing. I can also give you a hug. “HUGS” I hope that helps in some way.

  2. Juliet says:

    Same here … I don’t know if it’s an option for you but I sometimes meet with a friend and we do uni stuff together. We’re not studying the same subjects but it helps us to just sit together to be more committed to our work. The other thing that’s really helpful for me is to go to the library where so many unknown people are that are all working on something too. It just helps me to see that others are having similar issues with papers, etc. Plus, in a library: less distraction. Also, here’s my pro tip: Just don’t connect to the internet unless you really need it for your stuff – which is often just not the case except for research on literature… Don’t know if that was helpful for you but that’s how I’m doing my stuff and it mostly works for me.
    Hugs xxx

    • anxiouselephant says:

      Thanks for your tips Juliet, I should probably try them! I am going to the gym soon, so I am hoping I will feel more energetic and motivated afterwards! Hope you are having a good weekend! Hugs back xxx

  3. scienerf says:

    Start with something small…just pick up a book you need to use or a paper you need to read, sit with a cuppa and start reading. Your concentration may be through the floor but you know as well as I do once you start doing something you’ll soon get back into the swing of things 😉 I don’t think I even know what you’re studying! I hated my final year with all those assignments and so much pressure, but as Juliet said everyone is in the same boat, find someone who you can work with and there is no shame in not getting a first (I didn’t lol).
    If you’re really struggling talk to your mentor about it and get some help with it all that’s what they’re there for 😉 xox

    • anxiouselephant says:

      Thanks Mel, I know I need to get started and it’ll probably start getting easier but I can’t seem to focus for long enough to begin at the moment. I’m hoping tomorrow will be better and I will at least make a start! xxx

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