Bubbling Anger

I went to Asda with my mum this evening. I was feeling ok (well, as ok as normal.) We were walking down the pavement, just about to cross the road at the zebra crossing next to the entrance.

Then I saw a car I recognised. I could feel the anger bubbling up inside me, just seeing that car. I didn’t even know if it was HER car at that point. It was a green KA like she drives. Then I saw her blonde hair and smug face. It was her, which isn’t all that surprising considering she lives within a 5 minute walk of me.

I tried to keep calm. I kept walking. We went into the shop, and started buying the things we needed: fruit, vegetables, lamb chops… Then walking down the aisles I saw her again.

I didn’t speak to her. I don’t even know if she saw me. But even now I can feel myself almost shaking in anger. Seeing her evokes such a huge feeling of anger, like a volcano.

I have been on edge since. I know that I am close to snapping, which isn’t fair. I became irritated with my mum over nothing… Luckily I was aware of this so managed to keep calm, and didn’t lose it.

The point of this post is that I hadn’t realised just how close my feelings stay to the surface. I have not seen this girl for a quite a while, and I do not wish to see her again. I will have to write about why I hate her another time, but it’s (unsurprisingly) related to the ex.

The incident in question is referred to as “The Beer Incident”, but that’s another story, maybe I’ll write it later tonight!

10 thoughts on “Bubbling Anger

  1. My Mental Stream says:

    I’m sure you have seen the sheer volume of posts I have written on anger and either letting it out/controlling it. Write about it, get it out of your system, or talk to someone about it. failing that vigorous exercise is a great help for me. Good Luck

  2. Bourbon says:

    I absolutely hate running into people that for whatever reason you are upset with. My ex housemate that I have written about on my blog… I used to run into her quite a lot as we went to the same university and every time my legs would almost cave in. Sometimes anger. Sometimes fear. It knocks you for six. Hope you’re okay xxx

  3. aallegoric says:

    Wow, this sounds like me being in my hometown where you meet someone, anyone, you know (from school) all the time… ew. I hope it’s not ignorant to say but I’m so relieved that I’m not the only one who struggles with such stuff. I just always thought I were :s

    • anxiouselephant says:

      I know completely what you mean. Sometimes I feel like I don’t want to go out in my area because there are so many people I could bump into!! Like the time I got a text from my ex saying “so you’re in Asda then”, which REALLY freaked me out! I was looking over my shoulder for weeks after that!! xx

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